Ohio Supreme Court Rules “Boneless Chicken” Doesn’t Mean Boneless Chicken

In a move that suggests American courts are now being run by headless chickens, a judge recently laid this egg of a foul idea:

In a 4-3 ruling, the Supreme Court said Thursday that “boneless wings” refers to a cooking style, and that Berkheimer should’ve been on guard against bones since it’s common knowledge that chickens have bones. […] “A diner reading ‘boneless wings’ on a menu would no more believe that the restaurant was warranting the absence of bones in the items than believe that the items were made from chicken wings, just as a person eating ‘chicken fingers’ would know that he had not been served fingers,” Justice Joseph T. Deters wrote for the majority.

Deters could not be more wrong. Where do I begin?

First off, “boneless” is never a cooking style—uncooked chicken can be boneless. It by definition means without bones, regardless of how you cook it.

boneless:
adjective /ˈboʊn·ləs/ (also boned, us/boʊnd/)
(of meat or fish) without any bones

It’s common knowledge that boneless means no bones. This ruling is absurd. The judge is completely backward on “common” thinking, as nobody ever assumes chicken has bones when it’s described as boneless. That’s like saying it’s common knowledge that chicken is raw when it’s called fried.

If the meat is raw, calling it fried is false. If the meat has bones, calling it boneless is false.

Saying that boneless wings don’t guarantee the absence of bones is another cluck-up by the judge. “Boneless” is used to indicate the lack of bones. There’s no other reason for the word, whereas “wings” or “fingers” describe the preparation style. If someone orders wings and gets a pancake, or orders fingers and gets a ball, they would call it misleading.

In fact there was also a lawsuit by someone who ordered boneless wings when they were instead served ground chicken nuggets. Wings aren’t nuggets. People say boneless wings to mean they don’t have bones, whereas nuggets are ground up, showing how the term boneless can be unnecessary or redundant.

This judge is apparently unable to process such basic logic of the situation, making the American urge to sue highly problematic. I mean the judge somehow managed to get others to rule incorrectly along with him that boneless means bones.

As someone who prefers eating bones to meat, I find this judge to be completely divorced from reality. I’m not ordering boneless anything with the hope of ever finding a bone. But I am ordering wings instead of nuggets because it means something different.

Deters turns out to be infamously cruel and confused, struggling with moral reality.

The Rev. Paul Mueller, vice director and superior of the Jesuit community at the Vatican Observatory outside Rome, responded to those comments in an Aug. 6 letter to Deters, telling him, “I am disappointed, embarrassed, and scandalized that you, not only a Catholic but also a fellow alumnus of St. Xavier High School, have used the platform of your public office to oppose and confuse the moral teaching of the Church in so open a fashion.

“As Prosecutor,” Mueller added, “you are obliged to enforce civil law. But as a Catholic, you are obliged to endeavor to conform your own mind and heart to the higher moral law and help others in their efforts to do the same – not to undermine their efforts. The teaching of the Church is clear: in defending society against evil, it is morally unacceptable to make use of the evil of the death penalty.”

Well, when it comes to chicken, I certainly see how someone just “used the platform of public office to oppose and confuse the moral teaching” of thou shall not lie about boneless.

Deters’ latest ruling fits his past positions. It translates into him wanting Americans to choke to death on a bone—literally.

Canadian Olympic Coaches Fired After French Police Intercept Spy Drones

Canada has made several major technology gaffes lately, given their rushed immoral approval of the Cybertruck, and now this:

Coaching staff and contractors working with Canada’s men’s and women’s national soccer teams have been engaged for years in efforts to film the closed-door training sessions of their opponents, including during the women’s gold-medal winning Olympic tournament in 2021, two sources with first-hand knowledge of the activity told TSN.

[…]

On Thursday, Canada beat New Zealand 2-1 in their Olympic tournament opener.

Lombardi was caught by French police on Monday, after they saw him retrieve a drone that had been flying over the New Zealand team’s training, The Globe and Mail reported. The Globe reported that police retrieved footage of a second New Zealand training session from the drone and also obtained text messages between Lombardi and Mander. The text messages reportedly showed that Mander was aware of Lombardi’s activities.

Interesting how the French Police have been so quick and effective at drone prohibition, given Canada has gotten away with cheating for so many years. Apparently they cheat the most at home games?

Ironically, either these hyper-competitive Canadian coaches weren’t improving basic drone secrecy protocols at all (e.g. use a dead drop) or they fell into the trap of believing their own lies.

Related: the unsafe and unreliable Cybertruck can’t be driven in France.

Parce que les piétons ne sont pas les mêmes aux USA tout simplement : les américains ont une couche de gras supplémentaires les protégeant en cas de choc : cette couche absorbe les chocs et protége les piétons.

Tesla “Kool-AI Man” Crashes Through Wall Into a Toronto Restaurant

Design failures are suspected in yet another unnecessary Tesla crash, where the Kool “AI” driven car (robot) launched from standstill through a wall and into a restaurant.

…Peel Regional Police saying officers were called about the incident around noon. When police arrived on the scene they found a vehicle had crashed through a wall of the Pickle Barrel. Photos posted online show a damaged white four-door sedan inside the restaurant with debris, tables and chairs scattered about.

Nothing to see here, according to Tesla… because that’s some Kool AI Man.
Hey kids, Kool-AI Man from Tesla just destroyed your home, your mall, neighborhood. He’s so Kool Kool Kool.

In related news, Canada just approved the Cybertruck so even more properties and lives can be destroyed by people who can’t afford the robots they can’t control.

Oracle Settles Human Trafficking Allegations Based on Global Privacy Abuse Case

Oracle’s infamous Larry Ellison had very loudly boasted on stage about his illegal 5 billion person trafficking database.

Oracle’s systemic and widespread trafficking of people seems to have been settled as its former business model, after being caught and charged in court.

“This case is groundbreaking. The allegations in the complaint were that Oracle was building detailed dossiers about consumers with whom it had no first-party relationship. Rather than face a jury, Oracle agreed to a significant monetary settlement and also announced it was getting out of the business,” Barnes said. “The big takeaway is that surveillance tech companies that lack a first-party relationship with consumers have a significant problem: no American has actually consented to having their personal information surveilled everywhere they go by a company they’ve never heard of, packaged into a commoditized dossier, and then monetized and sold without their knowledge.”

If you may recall, a San Francisco law firm landed the claims two years ago even without any federal privacy law in the U.S., so a rapid high-fee settlement indicates Oracle was very deep in the wrong.

The suit, which was filed Friday as a 66-page complaint in the Northern District of California, alleges the tech giant’s “worldwide surveillance machine” has amassed detailed dossiers on some five billion people, accusing the company and its adtech and advertising subsidiaries of violating the privacy of the majority of the people on Earth.